To love me so.

First things first, I may be banned from Bass Lake, along with my entire family. Those poor people had no idea what they were getting into when they signed up to host our little gathering. We, on the other hand, had a blast.

The gals and I had been craving a girls trip for some time now so, when I heard about this wedding, I insisted that they come along. It was at the Pines Resort in Bass Lake which is right off the lake and only about five miles from Yosemite. I got to sleep in a loft that I'm told is usually only appealing to children but I loved it. I'm sure I don't have to go on about the beauty of nature and whatnot but waking up in that loft and sticking my head out of the tiny little window is pretty much the best way to start any morning.

As I mentioned after the bachelorette party, my family is nuts, but this time there were even more of us. At one point, Hanna looked at me and said that she thought she understood me before but that being around my family made me make even more sense. I am the product of madness. My family is loud, obnoxious, and ape shit crazy but they're also wonderfully witty, supportive, and not to be fucked with. Our group took over the resort and I never even bothered learning anyone's room number because all I had to do was wander into the loudest cabin with the open doors. 

My cousin married an Indian gent so us ladies all signed up to get henna done but there were so many of us that the poor woman was there all day. While they were doing the bride's, which alone took three hours, I noticed that she had dots on her legs so, obviously, my well trained eye saw hidden Mickeys and immediately asked for one in my design. It's the funnest little game of hide and seek.

The ceremony was outside by the lake which I thought was the loveliest setting. It was short but sweet. The bridal party danced down the aisle, there was some bible talk, and then it was over. I got a little annoyed that the pastor failed miserably at speaking both English AND Spanish but that's just me being sensitive. I also wasn't too fond of their music choices but I really shouldn't talk since I will not marry anyone that does not agree to this being our wedding song. It weeds out a lot of the duds, I think. 

The reception is where everything went off the deep end. My family dances. The whole lot of us like to get down but the DJ was TERRIBLE and would have been booed if he weren't friends with the groom. Luckily, we were all enjoying ourselves too much to care that the same song was played five times. By the end of the night, some douche was peeing in a water fountain, my sister had sealed her fate for the next morning, and I had punched someone in the face. You know, standard wedding stuff.

The next morning, Lily forced me to wake up so that we could check out and hit up Yosemite before heading home. I'm really glad that we made time for it because all of the wedding requirements severely hampered my nature time. Very hard to describe Yosemite besides just saying that it's unreal. Pictures don't do it justice but I gotta try, right?

So now I'm considering actually putting away my luggage that has been out since the beginning of March. Won't need it again until June when Cindy goes east coast.

Water Lily.

A Hannimal in her natural habitat.

Sleepy heads.

Mickey not pictured.

Whatchu want!?!?

Get. It.

This is how we do it.

Last week I reached that level of exhaustion that makes you think that there is no other place you would rather be than the bed that you plopped down on even though you are actually really cold since you didn't have it in you to dig your way under the covers, your arm has gone numb because you landed on it when you fell into place, and you are ignoring the fact that a control is digging into your side as if to say "you aren't sleeping, are you?" So I guess you could say that I needed to blow off some steam this week.

Luckily, my cousin's bachelorette party was this weekend so I was obviously obligated to return to Vegas. I know my last trip was very anti-typical but I can't help but love how much this one was the complete cliché experience, besides the fact that I still can't get into gambling away my money and will avoid a buffet at all costs. Vegas with a huge group of girls means that it wasn't very hard for us to get on a list at Hyde the first night. As far as Vegas clubs are concerned, it's pretty typical, except that it has an open patio that looks onto the Bellagio water show and the rest of the strip beyond that. Apart from the ape shit view, the best part was realizing how badly I needed to dance it out. Sometimes you just gotta.

The official festivities began on Saturday at Dick's Last Resort which was responsible for the most exciting part of the evening since their...robust DJ decided that the bride needed a lap dance to the tune of My Pony. 

After that experience, the strip club couldn't compare. I'm not sure if you can tell from how well adjusted I am but my family is NUTS. On the way to the strippers, my mother stuck her ass out of the limo window and started a dog pile with my aunts. What's worse is that she doesn't even drink. This is how she behaves perfectly sober. The strippers were what I expected strippers to be. I feel like, if girl strippers acted like male strippers do, they would make so much more money. Personally, I think grabbing my butt as I get out of my seat is completely ass backwards (I couldn't resist) but I think guys might appreciate it more.

Finally, we booked it to Moon at the Palms because we had reserved a table. Each and every one of us ended up with incriminating photographs. Drunken family drama conversations, making moochers cry, Maroon 5 stunt doubles, and my lack of grace rounded off my evening. Woke up with a massive bump on my head, terrible back pain, a scabbed knee, a busted pinky, and a scratch that very closely resembles a 90s tribal arm band. VEGAS!

I know, I know, I'm gorgeous.