Tuesday, March 5, 2013

Alien Finger Puppets: 3 for $1

"And now a quarter of my life is almost past. I think I've come to see myself at last."                                              - The Lovin' Spoonful


Walt Disney could not imagine how amazing my birthday was. Loved every minute of it. Even the few hiccups, like being unbearably exhausted and arriving at our room to realize that our keys weren't working and having to drag our sad corpses to the front desk, were endlessly entertaining.

There is so much more to Vegas than the watered down drinks in extra large souvenir cups and gambling. I put all of a whole entire dollar into a slot machine, lost it in one go, and was perfectly satisfied with that level of participation. I think it's hilarious that some people never even bother to go downtown. The first thing we did after checking in was head downtown and, in spite of the creeper dude that decided to tell me how good I smelled right before strapping me into my harness, the zip line was a masterful idea on my part. I like to think that I'm pretty fearless, and I've already conquered every roller coaster in Vegas, but even I had a massive lump in my throat when they told me to push myself off of the scaffolding and into what felt like certain death. Though it just doesn't get much better than flying passed vintage Vegas staples.

The next morning we headed right back downtown for the Neon Museum which was just the type of surreal that I want to swim in at all times. I have this weird thing for unexpected objects in really large numbers and huge dilapidated neon signs entirely strengthened that love affair. It's such a fascinating mixture of bright and faded and extravagant yet decrepit. And even though I was too engulfed in a manic photo moment to pay too much attention, I still enjoyed the parts of the tour that I managed to catch in between shutters about certain mob ties and how often Vegas demolishes casinos. I even got a little nostalgic at the end of the tour when I saw the old Sahara sign because I remember staying there before it closed.

After refueling with an incredibly delicious meal at Grand Lux, we found the energy to pick a show to see and, while it was hard to decide against Thunder From Down Under, we finally settled on Zumanity. I'm certain that Thunder could not have been hotter than the moaning bondage aerialist so it was definitely the right choice. I think it's my second favorite Cirque show after Love.

To complete our downtown trifecta, we ended up at Hogs & Heifers on my birthday and I got to dance on the bar in an inappropriately short dress. Could a girl ask for anything more?


I don't know how we managed to drag our asses up the next morning but we had a pretty big detour planned. The Little A'Le Inn is a terribly cheesy alien themed diner about three miles from Area 51 but we went purely on the basis that it was a shooting location for two X-files episodes. Hanna's quite fond of the X-files and I'm always up for something that teeters over the edge of sanity so I knew it would be fun but I had no idea that it would be AWE INSPIRING. I'm the biggest fan of California but I have to say that Nevada just has better roads to gawk at. Each scene looked unreal and alone would have made the trip worthwhile so the diner was just the cherry on top (even though I don't much care for cherries). By the time we got there I was starved and more in need of coffee than usual what with the birthday hangover and all. There is no way that I can do this place justice but there were signed dollars tapped to the ceiling, constant conversations about alien theories, and the main form of transportation appeared to be dirt bikes. UFOs, rusty trucks, and cows were responsible for my second manic photo moment.

Do I even have to say it? Best. Birthday. EVER.

(I swear I tried to pare these down)

BONEyard.
Pretty/Ugly challenge.
Atomic.
Not fit to drive.
By popular demand.

Phew! That was tough. I actually have a billion more pictures.

11 comments:

  1. Why be negative when you could be cow?

    Your photos of the truck are so much better than the ones that I got!

    SO MUCH FUN

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    Replies
    1. I have SO MANY pictures of the truck! Bound to get some good ones.

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  2. I have already expressed this grievance to Hanna, but I will reiterate that I am rather disappointed that neither of you you have posted any photographs of the famous finger puppets! You can't dangle a carrot like that out there and not show us! XD

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    Replies
    1. Hanna can't be blamed since they were never in her possession and I just can't believe that anyone would request MORE pictures, but I gotchu. Updated.

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    2. That was much better than Hanna's response, she just made a rude joke! Haha. Pics were totally worth the wait. Amazing. I am entertained by the dumbest shit.

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    3. That girl can be so tactless. Although, it was pretty funny.

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    4. tactless, disgusting bitch. GROSS, HOW DARE SHE

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    5. It's nothing less than I have come to expect from her, to be honest.

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  3. Also, the whole "Why be negative when you could be cow" thing totally reminded me of this - http://jokideo.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/moo-judi1.png

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  4. omg that left alien's eyes!! so adorably crooked

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    Replies
    1. And only one of them has ears! Quality craftsmanship, right thurr.

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